Bluberries!!!
I seemed to be pretty damn focused yesterday, but today my mind seems to be all over the place again...very hard to concentrate on and manipulate ideas. My parents didn't really help that all that much :-(...yeah it seems that ne time I'm back to where i need to be and find my Self, things get tough with my parents or school or both, but that's how it is i guess, life wasn't guarenteed to be easy. I mean things aren't all that bad though. I got the Republic to read and my banjo to play, and i just gotta be pushing forward on my homework despite my parents' ridiculous tantrums and decisions. Just wish i had more jess in my life...and my parents accepted her more :-(. Yeah and i still feel like i have a lot of great and important stuff to say right now, but again, my mind just isn't hitting it tonight. Just gotta be working on my homework i guess. Been a pretty good ash wednesday religiously though. I decided I was never meant to fast :-P lol. Ok ok it was good for me though...not to lose weight or ne thing, but as a major sacrifice cuz i'm usually ALWAYS eatting when i can lol. Yeah i had a yogurt for breakfast, cheese wrap for lunch...but supper was a bit more...two helpings of pasta with imitation crab lol....i just couldn't take it ne more...needed food....or...UG!!! Yeah and then I've been good at holding back selfish desires today, not to say i wasn't faced with desirous urges, but hopefully after the 40 days i'll be purified of that. So yeah...ok enough for everyone and time for my jess lol. Yeah babe i kinda felt distant and tired today, sorry if i did a bad job expressing my love today. GRRR it's almost 8 and still no hw done :-(...so time to work....
OK babe this is entirely for you i guess...and i guess i made this blog public, so it's for everyone else too...so hi everyone!! lol ok yeah i'm a little tired and i should be doing some english hw right now, but i really don't have much. Just a lot due later on in the week. Ok ok i'm boring the everyone else right now...lol although you gotta be pretty bored as it is to go around checking out blogs like this one...lol especially this one...all about me and loving jess. No it's more than that though. It's a way for me to get out my thoughts for jess and the rest of you, and especially for myself. I definately haven't though as much as i used to or should lately...just kinda been floating around...and i need something like this so i can take a look at my life and start thinking about it and being a part of it again instead of a spectator on my own life. So for all u worried individuals who decided to view this page with the hopes of a quenched boredom...you will not be met by constant ramblings about how much i love my jess...although it will come cuz this is supposed to be to her afterall lol. So i don't know exactly when i'm gonna show her this. I should fill it up with a ton of stuff first. Alright, enough wasted time...i DO have work to do and i'm getting damn tired. Babe, you're in too silly a mood tonight..all emotional and stressed and all and just relax cuz i'm sending you more love than you could ever imagine, and i hear that stuff will cure ne thing. i love u tons jess and i always will....